Beer and Sport » wallabies

Wallabies to win the Tri Nations

Moses — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 13:45:36 +0000

Laugh at me if you will, but I just stuck $20 on the Wallabies to win this years Tri Nations.

To do this, we need to beat the Boks in Perth and Brisbane, then it gets interesting.

Considering we’ve got the only 2 bonus points in the comp so far, if we score 4 tries in Brissy and pick up a third we don’t even need to win the Auckland to take the title!

Still think my 20:1 punt is a shocker?

Financial pressures mount

Moses — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 23:29:40 +0000

Vodafone hit by the GFC

As I feared this morning the Vodafone announcement of throwing the poms out on their árse could be more widespread than initially reported. The ARU have just announced that Australia A will withdraw from the Pacific Nations Cup in 2009, and that the Australian Rugby Shield will be suspended. These has been no word of a Vodafone link, but the co-incidence is not a good sign. I write more on this development over at Green and Gold Rugby.

It gets worse for the combined cricket board of Denmark, White South Africa, Papua New Guinea, Wales and England with the news that Allan Stanford is pulling out of his Stanford tournament. Matt Prior is most upset as he has not yet floated his indecent proposal.

Pie-man strikes back

Moses — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 23:46:13 +0000

Growden ate all the pies

Greg Growden’s back to his old tricks. I had led myself to believe he’d toned it down since Knuckles refused to answer questions from ‘the fat one’ at last years Rugby World Cup, but that’s probably cause I avoid anything with pie-man’s by line on it these days.

What could possibly be his motivation for writing off the Welsh captain and star winger 3 days before we play Wales for a clean sweep of the Northern Hemisphere?

Giteau was not even the best in the position he played, let alone the best player in the world. This is not our fight, leave it to the kiwi’s to explain how McCaw was robbed and lets get on with our preparaton for a clean sweep.

One of my many complaints about the pie-man when I wrote the bone growden petition was:

His ramblings consistently give opposition teams motivation to step up against the Wallabies

and in this context it’s fair to say he’s back to champagne form. The Welsh are understandably upset that some Aussie hack has called into question the credentials of Shane Williams who I believe to be the most exciting backline player in the last 12 months, and a deserving winner of the IRB player of the year award. Besides, McCaw was offside for 11 of the last 12 months.

Fleet Street Flutter with Fantasy

Moses — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 00:15:19 +0000

It seems that Sportsmail Reporter from England’s Daily Mail watched a different game to the rest of us last weekend.

Vickery and fellow prop Andrew Sheridan were frustrated by Australian spoiling tactics which saw scrums persistently collapse, England giving away a string of penalties and even suffering the indignity of being pushed off one of their own scrummages.

So, according to a journalist so brave he signs his articles as “Sportsmail Reporter”,the scrums collapsed due to “Australian spoiling tactics”, cause um, they’re Australian and just enjoy collapsing scrums. It had nothing at all to do with the pompack retreating after the engage, nor the English props not binding despite numerous warnings from Jonker.

As for the ‘indignity of being pushed off one of their own scrummages’, do you think he’s referring to the attacking one 5 metres out from our posts, the one on halfway, or the one on their 22? It’s difficult to be sure but that seems more like 3 to this uneducated convict.

Stephen Moore – Man of the match

Moses — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 04:52:38 +0000

Here’s a picture of Stephen Moore holding up his well earned Man of the Match Trophy. And what a trophy it is, from this angle I’d describe it as a well hung lawn bowling unicorn. It’s mounted on a stand, but also comes with a blue ribbon which presumably goes around your neck. Would have looked great to wear it out in Twickenham the night after the match.

Stephen Moore man of the match

Personally I’d have given it to Al BaxTAH, but Moore did have a good game also. In truth, any of the forwards could have taken the honours, even the bearded one who was no-where near the wing. Someone please tell Sharpe not to shave, well at least not until February.

Poms vs Wallabies – Translation

Moses — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 23:06:46 +0000

Al BaxTAH destroying Andy Sheridan

This blog is called Beer and Sport for a reason, and that was never clearer than my coverage of the England vs Australia Test Match Rugby at 3am on Sunday morning. For those of you who struggled with my live match report, here is a sober translation.

ino try mother fúcker!

We scored a try, yay

commentary is mofúckingshízerhousern. and what’s with the ads@

The Channel 10 coverage is appalling. They only seem to have one commentator who is some pompous and quietly spoken Pom, who’se considered reflections add nothing to the spectacle. Think Sir Henry Blowfield on prozac.

ghey as.

Ryan Cross just did something stoopid

sackeyt you dumbshít mofo, kick it TGITS!

England winger, Paul Sackey, just executed a poor midfield kick that went straight to Wallabies fly-half Matt Giteau.

damn, missed onej. half time, 12-11

Oh bother, Matt Giteau just missed a kick at goal. It’s halftime and the Wallabies are leading 12-11.

CARN WALABI…..sorry ch10 ad break…………………….ES!!!!

We were playing some good attacking rugby when I was left high and dry by the Channel 10 coverage swapping to an advertisment in the middle of play. When they came back, play is up the other end of the field.

As a subscriber to Foxtel and someone who is prepared to pay a premium to watch sport live, it is most frustrating to live in a country where the government legislate to protect the right of ‘Free to air’ stations to deny me live coverage of sporting events.

I dont have abig enough font but

TIGHTEASDDSD!~!!@!~

Oh, I do believe that the much maligned Wallabies Scrum just pulled off a Tighthead. That is to say we won the ball on the opposition feed by literally shoving their front row’s head up their árses. I am rather impressed by this feat and wish to convey my happiness in blog form by using the biggest font availble.

The Set Piece from Twickenham

Moses — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 22:43:45 +0000

A hell of a lot was written in the leadup to this Test Match at Twickenham, and pretty much all of it was about how the Poms would smash the Aussie Scrum.

It was so refreshing to see us not only gain parity in the set piece but to absolutely demolish the great unwashed with two tightheads was a thing of beauty.

I’ve cut out all the scrums in a Stephen Jones tribute video for your enjoyment

I reckon the turning point when we really started to smash em up front was Palu’s substitution for Brown. Looking forward to Wycliff getting his starting spot back next week.

And to those who’ve been bad-mouthing Australia’s most capped and my favourite prop Al BaxTAH, who you’ll notice is front and centre in my banner of legends, feel free to shut the fúck up before Al sticks your head up your árse along with Andy Sheridans.

Wallabies meet the Queen

Moses — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 05:20:14 +0000

Wallabies meet The Queen

Nice photo this one, looks like Queeny just dropped a stinker and Mortlock is the only Wallaby able to keep a straight face.

Dean “the white Mummba” Mumm is tucking into the Vodka and Oranges, and is that John O’Neill I see hiding behind her royal highness? Dare I ask what his his hands are doing??

It makes sense for the Queen to meet the enemy, it’ll give so much more meaning to the knighthoods bestowed on the captain and coach, not to mention the OBE’s for the remaining players if they do happen to win.

Interblog Warfare – Honkers Test

Moses — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 23:52:42 +0000

Smackdown

MC Gregor, the magic fuel pill peddling West Australian Succeeding Kiwi wants a small wager on the Honkers Test. Personally, I’d have preferred the Bledisloe Cup to be put on this test, however that’s out of my hands.

So instead, we’re sticking editorial humiliation on the line. The wager, in MC Gregor’s own words

If Australia wins. I’ll write a mea culpa, heartbroken, humble match report for your blog. It will be white hot with pain and regret. If the Blacks win, you can do the same on the Balls?

I reckon there’s a fair chance we can get Leg Break and Matt to man up, which would make it two Aussies (one in exile) and two Kiwi’s (one in exile) ready to pen the artcile.

On a side note, I’ve got a bloody wedding this weekend and if the unthinkable happens my review of the match will be a few days late till I find an Internet Cafe…

Strongest Baa Baa’s ever to take on Wallabies

Moses — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 03:53:00 +0000

Gregan’s long time understudy at the Brumbies Luke Burgess is set to go head to head with his former master in December’s London Olympic centenary match at Wembley.

In a star studded Baa Baa’s lineup that has both Gregan and Fourie Du Preez I feel that Fourie may play this match at 10. The squad will be captained by Richie ‘tackles’ McCaw and coached by World Cup winning combination of Jake White and former Wallabies mentor cum technical analyst and Eddie ‘Steady’ Jones for good measure.

In what looks to be the strongest squad to ever wear the blue and white hoops, of those announced so far the team is looking like:

1. TBA
2. John Smit (RSA)
3. Carl Hayman (NZ)
4. Steve Borthwick (Eng)
5. Bakkies Botha (RSA)
6. Jerry Collins (NZ)
7. Schalk Burger (RSA)
8. TBA

9. George Gregan
10. Fourie Du Preez (RSA)
11. Bryan Habana (RSA)
12. Jean de Villiers (RSA)
13. TBA
14. Joe Rokocoko (NZ)
15. Percy Montgomery (RSA)

Coach: Jake White
Assistant Coach: Eddie Jones