Tag Archives: NSW Waratahs

New South Wales Waratahs

Waratahs Clothing Appeal

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The Tahs have arrived back in Sydney, however 95% of their playing kit has failed to follow them. It’s times like this that the fans can step up and really support the team, so dig deep into your rugby merchandise cupboard and donate whatever you can to help out the boys in light blue.

Donation bins have been installed at all major shopping centres (pictured), with team management specifically appealing for undergarments and toiletries. Lote has put in a special request for a bottle of Soul Glo.

I’ve already donated two of my Tahs’ Jerseys (the third one has been given to my brother-in-law after a recent bet he lost), as well as some spare boxer shorts and three pairs of odd socks.

While appreciative of the public’s generosity in the appeal to this point, there is a real dearth of XXXXL merchandise. Fortunately they made Morgs hand in his gear when he moved north last year so that’s Bennnn covered, however at this stage the rest of the pack will be running around shirtless which could present some difficulty in getting a decent bind. It should be noted that our scrum is still expected to monster the ailing Reds pack.

Waratahs management have assured me personally that all borrowed gear will be signed and returned to the owners as soon as they find the missing bags last seen strapped to the roof of a Joberg taxi.

Backing the Tahs

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As many of you know, last week I got married. My wife is a strong supporter of the Natal Sharks, as is her family who live in Durban.

On the evening of our wedding, the mighty NSW Waratahs (then 4th placed) were playing the Natal Sharks (2nd placed) – as you can imagine a lot of talk was to be had between myself and my (now) brother in law Steve. The bookies had the match about even.

In the end a wager was had on the outcome of the game – the supporter of the losing team would switch allegiences until our first anniversary.

Kickoff was 7.40, however with no access to a television or mobile coverage we were all unaware of the score.

During Steve’s speech he was jibbing me about how I was to become a loyal Sharks supporter, even managed to dig up a Sharks T-Shirt that I would be wearing for the next week in the case of a loss.

We both managed to duck out and check the score just before my speech, at this time it was 25-10 with 1 minute to go.

Steve held on to the slim hope that the Sharks were 5m out and looked likely to score, I was quick to remind him that they were unlikely to score 3 times in 90 seconds, especially with that wall of blue in their way.

So, now Steve is a Tahs Supporter until the 26th April 2009. Living in Durban this is likely to present some challenges, however he does have my old Tahs jersey (circa 2003) which does give the wearer super powers, so should come through unscathed.

We’ll be posting regular pictures of Steve enjoying his new found Tahness in this thread, so be sure to stay tuned.

the mighty Tahs in 6 word descriptions

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The 6 word descriptions are taking over the Cricket Blogosphere, I thought I’d introduce the Rugby world to the phenonamon. I don’t know who started the trend, however the first I saw it was by his Suaveness over at Republic Cricket.

Without further ado:

Matt Dunning - Will always be Andy Sheridan’s bitch
Tatafu Polota-Nau – Holds up scrum on his own
Adam Freier - On the bench now Tatafu throws straight
Benn Robinson - Good beard, great prop, lame numberplate

Daniel Vickerman - Saffer, Aussie, Pom, cheers for memories
Will Caldwell - Last lock standing, ladies love Will

Dean Mumm - was a lock now a flanker
Rocky Elsom - Please don’t leave us next year
Phil Waugh - is our leader, resistance is futile
Beau Robinson - Jerry Collins is his bitch, Hard
Wycliffe Palu - Out of gaol now, massive unit
David Lyons - Could become most capped Waratah ever

Luke Burgess - speaks real posh, danced round Rokocoko
Brett Sheehan - Angry midget, quite slow to breakdown
Josh Valentine - can’t hold bench spot, heading west

Kurtley Beale - Drink and Drive, Catch the Bus
Daniel Halangahu - Second Five Eigth, can’t turn left

Tom Carter – Solid defence, could move for Hangers
Timana Tahu - Good Hands, Breaks line and hamstring
Ben Jacobs - More injuries than bloody Shane Watson
Rob Horne - Bloody fast, great name, future Wallaby
Lote Tuqiri - Doesn’t like SNK or Hewat, Loaded
Lachie Turner - Is he blonde or a gingah?
Sam Norton-Knight - Finally a fullback who can kick

Ewen McKenzie - Sacked mid season, Off to France
Todd Louden - Taught Bulls how to score tries

All Star Tahs Coaching Team

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With the imminent departure of URL McKenzie, it’s time for us to put together the dream team of NSW Rugby Coaching Excellence.

Waratah Jesus has thrown his hat into the ring, and with some divine inspiration he may yet make Laurie Fisher seem conservative at post match interviews.

Les Kiss is staying due to his cool name. Alfi Mafi is to have his name changed by deed poll to Ralph Malph. Shouldn’t cost much as $50′s the going rate for a vowel and we’re selling two.

Timana Tahu will recognise his Maori ancestry and return to spelling his name Tah’u.

Campo is coming home as Media Manager and Tah Man trainer. We’ll see that quad bike put into some space before the end of the season. Eddie Jones will be retained as team clown.

Australia’s most capped prop will be retiring to make way for someone who can hold up a scrum. Dunning will be put on a donut and taxi diet. We’ll also be ramping up his corporate presence in recognition of his cult status with the blue bloods.

Sagerian will be working promotions with the Fleet Girls. He’ll also be taking on the important role of team guinness taster.

Chook will be the team Yoga instuctor. A well stretched team performs well on the field.

Lizz will become Sharon’s understudy. Woop Woop.

Peter Hughes will be elected Chairman of the board with the mission to keep it real.

Mattyj can retain his spot as president of Beauwatch.

Lexington is taking the position of motivational coach for Will.

UK Talent Scout: greenandgoldrugby with eke as his understudy. g is too lazy to hold down a position.

Costa Lote is going to be given the arse for being a whinging bitch. The 3 million we save is to be split between Rocky, Aussie Dan, and someone who can kick. Cameron Shepherd is top of my list.