What a great ground for cricket

Here’s a brainwave though, move the series to Fiji. They’ve been an associate member of the ICC since 1965, and have contested 7 ICC Champions trophies, the most recent in 2001. Now I’m not an administrative genius or anything, but I reckon playing cricket in Fiji could be a good way to grow the game there.

The tests can be held at the Fiji National Stadium in Suva (pictured). It’s got a 30,000 seat capacity and due to the athletics track around the perimeter has a good oval shape to it. A drop-in pitch can be shipped up from Australia at the BCCI’s expense, I believe they grow them in Darwin for the MCG.

The beauty of this plan revolves around the crowd attendance. Fiji has over 300,000 Indians who account for a staggering 37% of the population. Unlike complacent Indian crowds who couldn’t even be buggered to watch Sachin break the Test run record, these Fijian Indians might actually show up to the match and provide what used to be known as ‘atmosphere’.

What’s more it’s really nice in Fiji. Freddy can get pissed and peddle boats around. Harmy can bowl wides, and KP can take his team on a big game fishing trip to help them get over the loss of Stanford’s millions..

Ricky losing Gillies trophy

10. Losing the toss
I’d love to see some stats on how many teams have won in India with a first innings defecit. Batting first is key and each test was controlled by the opening innigns. Losing 3 tosses did put us at a dis-advantage, but we could have overcome this.

9. Stupid and thoughtless Dismissals
If you hit the ball directly to mid-on and run you deserve an uppercut. There really is no excuse for this in test cricket, and Hayden, Ponting and Hussey are all guilty as charged in the 4th test. Other memorable brain farts go to the collapse in Mohail that set up India for a win, some of Haddin’s half-hearted spoon’s directly to fielders, and Clarke’s last over lapses.

8. Team Unity
Ponting’s on field spat with Lee in Mohali was the lowest point of the tour. It sent out a message of dis-unity, bad communication, and a team in crisis. These disputes no doubt often happen when touring, but for fúcks sake keep them behind closed doors.

8. Lacking the killer instinct in Bangaluru
Our run rate was simply too slow in the first test, 2.86 in the first innings was below par but the real lack of intent was blocking out Kumble at the end of Day 4. The pre-declaration slog has been sorely missing from this current baggy green squad, oh how I miss thee. The lack of urgency in the first test led to us running out of time with bad light when we could well have been leading 1-0 going to Mohali.

7. the SG Ball
Despite having Troy Cooley who is widely regarded as the best bowling coach in the business, our bowlers didn’t get the SG Ball to talk until Watson and Krejza achieved enlightenment in the 4th Test. Brendan Julian in an interview with Watson about the Indians bowling the new ball cross-seam after Day 4 Test 1, yet at the end of Test 2 the word was we didn’t realise what they were doing.

6. Ordinary fielding
All the direct hits we are used to have gone fishing. Roy, while missed with bat and ball, it is his presence in the field who’se abscence is hurting us most.

5. The spinner
Cameron White is not a Test standard wicket taking bowler. If we were after a part timer, David Hussey or Shaun Marsh would have been worth a nod, but we already have Shane Watson and Michael Clarke as all rounders. The team was never in need of a number 8 batsman. We needed a spinner, or at least someone who had the potential to become a spinner. The selection of Krejza was dictated by no-one else being in the squad, and turned out brilliantly. However, when McGain went home injured we should have called up another spinner to give us more options. Why didn’t we take 5 spinners over if only to get them some experience? We could probably lend them out to Indian domestic teams then pick whoever is performing.

4. Impotent bowling plans
The Mohali pitch was a road when we bowled and a minefield when we batted, then reverted to a road, then back to a minefield. The Indian bowlers to their credit got movement in the air and off the deck while our boys broke their backs bowling uphill into the wind.

3. Not bowling Simon Katich
Why the hell did Rick only bowl Katich in the third test? In the 40 odd overs of spin on Day 5 of the 1st test Katto could well have made the breakthrough. In the second test our attack was impotent as we waited patiently for Anil to declare, still no Katto. In the third test he finally got a shot and looked dangerous from the first ball. He bought some much needed aggression to the bowling crease and had to be seperated from Gambhir by Billy, then dismissed Ganguly. Perhaps the biggest compliment of all was VVS failing to pick his pearler of an arm-ball. So having finally tried Katich, seen him bowl well in Indian conditions, Rick forgets all about it and gives him just 3 tidy overs in the 1st innings in Nagpur on a wicket on which the Off-Spinners were lethal, surely the left-arm chinaman was worth a bit more of a spell?

2. Stars not firing
An ordinary series from Lee who through a hand injury, food poisoning and generally bad form picked up 8 wickets at 61. Ponting started with 123 then went on to score 143 in his next 6 appearances. Hayden copped some ordinary Rauf’s early on but in truth didn’t wake up until the final innings of the series, by which time Ponting had already surrendered.

1. Píss Poor Captaincy
Ponting had a very poor series in many respects, none more so than after Tea on Day 4. There’s been suggestions of match fixing, and lets be honest, that makes more sense than any of his explanations for taking the foot off. Time for him to concentrate on his batting, give the captaincy to Clarke, Hussey, or…. Warne – he’d probably come back to be captain, especially with an Ashes Series coming up.

Ponting changing his field, again

Our over rate is a national disgrace. Ricky threw a test match in order to play New Zealand, apparently out of his love of playing for Australia. I’ve already had my say on that, now I’m going to say some more!

Ponting was fined 20% and the remainder of the team 10% of their match fees, which equates to roughly 0.05% of their annual IPL cashcow. But the really big loss was the Border-Gavaskar trophy which at tea yesterday we were a good chance to retain. I’ve read that a suspension for Ricky was not even on the table, a captain needs to be fined twice in a 12 month period for that to even be an option. Now he’s lost the test, the series, and still got the first fine.

Is 90 overs a day an unreasonable ask? So many teams seem to have trouble with this limit. After taking out drinks, wicket and injury allowances and adding the 30 minutes overtime that has become a rule rather than the exception in modern tests, the target is to bowl, on average, 15 overs an hour or 1 over every 4 minutes.

I’ve done the sums to get a better idea of just how slow we were on Day 4. By Tea we had bowled 50 overs, leaving us 10 short of the target. Of these, Krejza had 15, Johnson 13, Watson 12 and Lee 10. So with an off-spinner bowling 30% of the load, we’ve managed to drop 1 over in every 6! That is a seriously písspoor effort. The general consensus is that Ricky’s tri-overly field changes and general farking around between overs is killing the rate.

There are many ways to increase the over rate while still looking to take wickets – how bout bowling Simon Katich? Or Lee and Johnson off their ODI run-ups rather than the full test run-up? Why not move a bit quicker between overs? These highly pampered stars are professional sportsmen right, surely a jog from fine leg to long off every 4 minutes is not too much to ask?

Is bowling Hussey a good alternative? Sure he hides the ball when running it but who cares when it doesn’t swing? He still has a decent run-up, and I’m in no way convinced that Mike’s all that quick getting through his overs anyway, though I haven’t got out the stopwatch to be sure. Even when Ponting realised the lapse and bought on Hussey he still didn’t speed up his general farking around with the field. Is moving deep mid on 3 metres left then 4 metres right more likely to take a wicket than giving Shane Watson another over when he’s swinging both ways? One excuse I heard from Nielsen was that the quicks were tired, perhaps they could have rested in the 20 minute tea break?

The entire team was fined for this, however with our díckless coach I choose to blame the captain. He’s the one leading out there. He’s the one constantly moving the field. He’s the one deciding the bowling changes, and the one who could be speeding things up.

I was also under the impression that Ponting has been going through a lean patch with the bat, turns out he’s scored 997 runs in the last 12 months so I’ll let that slide, for now..

Bástard!

Mini-Rick the Prick

What a fúcking disgrace the third session was yesterday. I can’t believe Rick would be so fúcking stupid to compromise the full trophy cupboard he inherited from Steve for the sake of some shítty over rate.

Oh how I hate this inbred Tasmanian wánker. Let me count the ways.

• Would you sacrifice playing New Zealand in Brisbane for a better chance of winning in India? Hell Yeah!
• We managed to get 10 overs behind on the over rate, despite bowling Jason Krejza for 20ish overs
• Is it absolutely neccesarry to change the field three times an over?
• Why doens’t the moved fielder run to their new position during the tri-overly field changes?
• If the over rate is so damn important, why don’t we tell Lee and Johnson to shorten their run-ups like they do in ODI’s, as surely Lee off a half run-up when the ball’s reversing is still more threatening than Hussey?
• Why the bloody hell did we drop Stuart Clark for Cameron fúcking White, who despite my best wishes has proven to be a very ordinary number 8 batsman and less effective than Michael Clarke.
• Why not bowl Simon Katich? Ponting’s ignored him all series.
• Tim Nielsen is a díckless wannabe. They interviewed him last night and one of the reasons that the quicks didn’t bowl after tea was they were tired! Give me a fúcking break, there are three of them, they’d just had a 20 minute rest, and they could have bowled in tandem with Krejza.
• If we must play Cameron White, make him captain.. all he has to do is go out and lose the toss (as Rick for some help there), then Rick can still move his fields thrice an over, and Whitey gets the arse.

Time for Regieme Change. Nielsen to be given the arse for being díckless, Ponting demoted and on notice that the team is bigger than the man, and number 3 batsmen need to score runs.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d like for nothing more than us to pull this victory off, but it should have been so much simplier, and all the Indians have to do now is bowl a metre outside offstump to an 8-1 field like they did in the first innings. Then Rick will bítch about their defensive tactics while the Indians parade their Border-Gavaskar trophy in front of the 250 fans who bothered to show up in Nagpur.

I want Ponting dropped from captain and Nielsen and Chappel thrown out of the coaching staff. Time to give the reins to Tom Moody or Allan Border… and… Simon Katich

Katich Beard's a Hatrick

Day 3 in Delhi will be a day of demon slaying. Simon Katich doesn’t shave this morning and now has a beard, which is instrumental in his bearding up a quick century, before a mid-pitch collision with Gambhir that leads to his run out. Both players are summoned before Chris Broad for spirit of the game violations.

Ricky Ponting comes in last over before lunch and hits 28 off Kumble to get his eye in. The next two sessions are absolute mayhem with Ricky and Haydo’s going at 9.33 runs an over. By stumps Ricky is on 281* and Hayden 401* of which 202 came off Zaheer Khan, or Haydo’s bítch as he’s now known. Australia are sitting pretty overnight at 1/788. Brian Lara is spewing to have lost both big records in the same series.

Ricky and Haydos retire overnight and Australia open Day 4 with T20 specialists Cameron White and Shane Watson batting. They bat for exactly 20 overs and put on a further 220 runs (White 118* and Watson 102*) before Ricky declares 395 runs ahead at 3/1008.

Katich opens the bowling with Brett Lee. In his first over he has Sehwag caught and bowled off the back of his bat when his reverse sweep gets all tangled up. Next over Gambhir charges down the pitch at Katich, but Simon says no and fires the ball hard down leg. Haddin completes the stumping.

Dravid is caught the very next ball by Ponting who still refuses to wear a helmet at silly mid and Katto’s on a hatrick. VVS walks to the crease to the sound of 350 Indian fans screaming (another great day for crowd attendance). Katto bowls him the wrongun and VVS again fails to pick it, shouldering arms to the ball that beards him outside the line of off but has done enough to convince Billy to raise his crooked finger. 4/28.

Tendulkar is next to go, retired hurt by a corker of a delivery from Stuart Clark, that picthed on a good length and reared up viciously, smashing him on the neck. A helicopter is flown in and Tendulkar is medically evacuated. I hope he’s ok.

Play resumes and Ganguly takes 6 minutes to appear at the crease, and even then with two left gloves. Ponting appeals and the Prince of Calcutta is timed out.

Full credit for Dhoni’s wicket goes to Steve Waugh, though I doubt you’ll hear that story from Cameron White. Dhoni blocked a regulation straight delivery then it bounced back towards the stumps only for Dhoni to knock it clear with his gloved hand. Handled ball. White cried. Again. 7/84, 311 behind.

Brett Lee and Stuart Clark cleaned up the tail, with only Mishra providing some resistance with a hard fought 120. Australia win by an innings and 240 runs. Katto beards man of the match. True Story.

I’ve watched it a bunch of times and from my observations there was a bit of argy bargy that almost leads to a run-out escallates when Ghambir try’s to tell Billy that Katich was cheating by getting in his way. Katto responds with “that’s f’ucking shit man”. Brett Lee comes past and throws a few inaudible words of support behind his NSW captain, then Katto and Ghambir are at it again and you hear Simon utter “F’uck off mate”. Billy steps in when it looks like they might up the ante, and Michael Clarke comes in to calm the farm. Clarke has to make a pretty solid effort of holding back Katich who by this time looks like he wants to punch on.

Outright Bástard

The future Australian XI did well to restrict the star studded Redbacks outfit to 313 after they won the toss and elected to swing the willow.

A pumped up Bluetongues blew off the demons of losing their 50 Over match off a last ball misfield by scoring 576 runs in reply to the SA total, a superb effort from the pre-pubescent future Baggy Greens against the recently pronounced sane reverse swinging demi-god and “India-Ready” Shaun Tait.. who spectacularly failed to take any wickets at all with the first ball, then managed a massive 1 batsman and 2 bowlers with the second.

So, Day 4 and we were looking at bowling the Redbacks out to add outright victory to our firsts innings points, however Younis Khan has finally shed the jetlag and has been batting most of the day. What’s more he’s now taken the SA total past ours meaning we’ll have to bat again, Bastárd.

Grief is painful and at times seems bottomless. Intense emotions and mood changes are a normal part of grieving.

Grief is a natural reaction to death and other major losses and grieving is a very personal experience. There isn’t a right or a wrong way. How we grieve is determined by out culture, our relationship to the person and the way they died, as well as our individual personality. Some stages of grief are commonly experienced although not everyone will go through all these stages. Grieving is a fluid process and people may experince many different emotions in one day.
Mental Health Association

There are several stages of grief, and it’s important to realise that everybody is different. Some people grow hair on their cheeks, for example.

Over the last 5 days I have gone through Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Sadness, and now finally Acceptance.

It’s OK to cry, but only if you’re a former captain from Western Australia. Otherwise drink some concrete, bítch.

MOHALI: A bomb scare Monday at a factory near the Punjab Cricket Association (PCA) stadium where the second cricket Test between India and Australia is being played prompted the police to thoroughly search the stadium as a precautionary measure but nothing untoward was found, the authorities said.

An all-clear was sounded after the police searched the factory, located four km from the stadium.

The police also traced and arrested the man who made the hoax call and he said he did it for a lark.

“We called additional police force and searched every nook and corner of the stadium with the help of sniffer dogs and the bomb disposal squad. However, we took special care to ensure that the search operation did not hamper the match and create panic among the spectators,” Mohali police chief Jatinder Singh Aulakh told IANS.

True Story

Or I could blog in a bomb threat, you know, to save the Indians. I advise the Mohali officials to urgently look under seat 22B in the rhaji bhajji stand. And don’t go under 88 mph.