Ranga and Proud

Western Australia are awfully píssed off and seeking compensation after the original club championship was postponed due to men with guns. It’s a lot of cash they’re missing out on, and I feel a nice gesture would be for NSW Cricket to buy them a meaningful gift to ease the pain, perhaps a bronze statue of Simon Katich to stick up in the WACA headquarters..

You can bet the team we send to compete in India includes some names that have until this point played no part in the tournament such as Michael Clarke, Phil Jaques, Brett Lee, Stuart Clark and Brad Haddin. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as any NSW cricketer will know it’s the privilege and also the curse of representing the state that breeds the big names.

I’ve put together a short synopsis of the 5 matches that have earnt us entry into the World Club Championship, and awarded 3-2-1–1 ratings as I feel they’re warranted.

Game 1 vs Queensland in Brisbane

Scorecard
A good bowling effort led by Doug Bollinger‘s 3/22 and well assisted by Moises Henriques 2/26 restricted Queensland early on, however Beau Casson 0/37 and Mark Cameron 0/34 got spanked allowing the Bulls to amass to 161. Thanks to opening batsman Phillip Hughes scoring 80(20) the total was chased down with 2 balls to spare.

Moses’ Player 3-2-1–1 Ratings
3 Doug Bollinger
2 Phillip Hughes
1 Moises Henriques
-1 Beau Casson

Game 2 vs Western Australia in Homebush, Sydney

Scorecard
Tight bowling by Aaron Heal and Marcus North restricted NSW to 6/148 off 20 overs. 18 year old newcomer Stephen Smith was my pick of the batsmen with 34*(21), Dave Warner 28(22) scored freely early on, while Phillip Hughes 35(34) and Dominic Thornley 23(24) got starts but failed to up the tempo sufficiently against WA’s slower bowlers Marcus North 1/27(4) and Aaron Heal 0/22(4).
Nathan Bracken 2/24 was the pick of the bowlers, Dominic Thornley, Stephen Smith and Moises Henriques generally restricted WA to the required rate of 6-7 rpo, while Beau Casson was again spanked leaking 0/26 off his two overs which gave WA the win and led to his being dropped for the remainder of the comp.

Moses’ Player 3-2-1–1 Ratings
3 Stephen Smith
2 Nathan Bracken
1 Dave Warner
-1 Beau Casson

Game 3 vs South Australia in Adelaide

Scorecard
A solid batting performance by South Australia saw all of their batsmen scoring at 6.5 to 8.7 rpo, however they lacked one batsman to deliver the killer punch in their accumulation of 160 runs.
Mark Cameron was tidy with 1/22, Thornley 1/27(3) applied the brakes nicely and Aaron Bird 3/35 contributed vital top order wickets while leaking runs. Nathan Bracken 3/38 gets the bogey rating despite 3 late wickets saving his figures from absolute embarrassment.
Dave Warner 35(35) got the Blues response off to an absolute flyer, nicely assisted by pedestrian Phillip Hughes 30(29) and Dominic Thornley 28(18)

Moses’ Player 3-2-1–1 Ratings
3 Dave Warner
2 Dominic Thornley
1 Mark Cameron
-1 Nathan Bracken

Game 4 vs Tasmania in Homebush, Sydney

Scorecard
A destructive top 3 saw the Tassie Tigers belt 194 thanks to Lockyear 51(29), Dighton 43(29) and Birt 44(17). Dominic Thornley 0/22 was pick of the NSW bowlers with his 4 overs going for less than Stephen Smith’s 1 over 0/23. Doug Bollinger while moderately expensive took the essential wickets of Dighton and Birt, thus keeping the Tigers total below 200.
The destructive form of Dave Warner had him off to play South Africa, allowing the return of Simon Katich 18(12) and despite a solid opening stand with Moises Henriques 42(25) the fireworks were absent down the order and 166 was all we could muster.

Moses’ Player 3-2-1–1 Ratings
3 Dominic Thornley
2 Moises Henriques
1 Doug Bollinger
-1 Stephen Smith

Game 5 vs Victoria at Homebush, Sydney

Scorecard
The penultimate match, NSW entered this 4th on the table with nothing to lose. A brutal bowling spell by dirty Dirk Nannes 4/11(4) hit the Blues hard early on, with Henriques 1(3), Smith 4(6) and Rohrer 7(8) his early victims. O’Keefe 6(6) fell to a run out and only opener Simon Katich 35(26) was able to resist the dark side of Dirk Nannes. Dominic Thornley 36*(36) came out in the 4th over with the score at 4/39 and steadied the ship, batting with the tail and taking the Blues to a depressingly low 128.
Douggy Bollinger 0/12 applied the pressure with some superb tight swing bowling, and Mark Cameron 1/17 kept the other almost as tight. Falling behind the run rate the Victorians shat themselves, giving up 5 run-outs, one each to Cameron, O’Keefe, Rohrer, Bollinger and Smith. I’ll give Simon Katich some credit for these as captain he would have been setting the fields. Victorian captain and serial whinger Brad Hodge summed it up nicely with “It’s a script on how to stuff up a cricket game”. Bravo.
A wonderful team effort from the Blues who now book their tickets to India, there is no villain from this match.

Moses’ Player 3-2-1–1 Ratings
3 Simon Katich
2 Doug Bollinger
1 Dominic Thornley
-1 None

Leaderboard

At the end of the regular season, the Moses’ MVP stands as follows:

6 Dominic Thornley
6 Doug Bollinger
4 Dave Warner
3 Moises Henriques
3 Simon Katich
2 Phillip Hughes
2 Stephen Smith
1 Mark Cameron
1 Nathan Bracken
-2 Beau Casson

So now we declare giving them 24 overs today and a further 90 tomorrow totalling around 114. The target is 375 so they’ll need to score at 3.3 rpo to win the test! Given the history of this series so far that’s not even a long shot!

So now Ponting finds some balls! A shame he didn’t use them in the 4th Test in India, but balls are balls. The Saffas have a real shot at winning this test now. Personally I’d have batted another hour till we were 450 ahead then let em have it.

We should still win, and with a slight possibility of showers tomorrow Pontings’ given us the best chance of taking 20 wickets. If we are to lose though….

Edit: Douggie just got his first Test wicket! Sure it’s Morne Morkel but he’s an opening batsman now.

Angry Queenslander can fúck off

1. Simon Katich (c)

2. Phillip Hughes
3. Ricky Ponting
4. Michael Clarke
5. Michael Hussey (vc)
6. Andrew Symonds [needs big runs]
7. Brad Haddin
8. Mitchell Johnson [strike bowler - gets new ball and first massage]
9. Jason Krejza
10. Brett Lee [on a stern warning]
11. Peter Siddle
12. Doug Bollinger

However, I fully expect they’ll completely ignore the Moses XI and trust their instincts of picking out of form has beens with

1. Matthew Hayden

2. Simon Katich
3. Ricky Ponting (c)
4. Michael Hussey
5. Michael Clarke (vc)
6. Andrew Symonds
7. Brad Haddin
8. Jason Krejza
9. Brett Lee
10. Mitchell Johnson
11. and a Siddle in a pear tree

It was a good toss to win, but so was the toss we won in Bonnydoon or whatever they’re calling Bangalore this month.

Rudi Koetzen is having a barry crocker. He’s happy to refer 4′s to the third umpire but when it comes to a close stumping on Ganguly he’ll just say not out. Turns out Gangers foot was in the air as Haddin removed the bails, and Gangers went on to notch up a hundred, so yes this did hurt Australia. It’s the worst mistake the Colonel has made since not referring Kumble’s caught and bowled on Ponting in Bonnydoon, though that mistake only cost India 10 runs.

The writing was on the wall for Australia when Kumble was dropped. Not only do they get a proper leggie in Mishra who turns it a mile, has 300 domestic wickets, and possesses one hell of a deceptive wrongun, but they get Dhoni as captain who has inspired them in the field and suddenly remembered how to bat. Assuming his fitness returns Kumble may get to carry the drinks in the third test.

Credit must go to the Indian Batsmen, though it must be said if they were to have any concers, it should be all of their batsmen making starts on a road against undisciplined bowling and not going on with it. Still, to have a question mark over the batting and make 470, it could be worse.

And by worse, I mean Australia. Hayden failed again, and this time he can’t blame the umpire. Had Jaques not gone home with a buggered back he would be looking good for the 3rd test. I was most upset when Hussey gave Clarke the strike for the last over on Day 3, as Clarke is now officially a final over bunny. Each time he goes out right before stumps I die a little inside. Hussey has ridden one hell of a lot of luck and still only made 50. Ponting went to the new ball that Hayden shouldn’t be exposing him too, probably too early to judge.

This is hardly news, but we are sorely missing a quality spinner. White has bowled better than expected, but I expected him to bowl 3 pies per over and he has only delivered 1 every 12 balls. So he’s been tight, but not threatening. Mishra has given him a lesson in turn, deception and bounce.

Johnson must have pissed Punter off, cause as our best paceman in both tests he would have expected to get the new ball. Siddle must be the chosen one in Pontings eyes, and his treatment couldn’t be further from that given to Tait, who was hyped all week in the press then held back till the last over before lunch on a juicy WACA wicket. He has bowled pretty well on debut, with lots of short stuff and the standard Victorian debutant first wicket of Tendulkar, but in truth offers little difference from Lee and really Bollinger should be there.

A fit Stuart Clark is sorely sorely missed. Nesta best articulated what he provides to the side

It’s been a long time since we haven’t had a clever back of the length bowler in the team – McGrath debuted in ‘93 – and although the Indians have problems too, this is the least confident I’ve been about a winning a Test since petrol broke the 50 cent barrier.

The only department in which Australia have been ahead is bums on seats – we’ve got a clear majority for paying patrons. If it weren’t for the Mohalians giving away free seats to kiddies Tendulkar would have broken the record in front of 240 travelling Aussies and his Mum.

Jim Maxwell and Spanky were on the radio and went into some detail on how one goes about securing a ticket to the match. You have to go to a bank in central Mohali and buy a 5 day pass. There is no single day pass, and no option to buy a ticket at the ground. The bank was presumably closed on Sunday. Go India.

I enjoyed giving shit to Merv the tour guide, when he walked past my seats at the Lords in 2005 I drunkedly ranted off in my best Billy Birmingham cum Bill Lawry accent “Merv, Merv, Merv, He’s a hero this man, I love him, I wanna boof him, Hail the great man, Hail”

I was bemused by Merv the radio co-commentator of Sir Henry Blowfield, surely the oddest couple ever put together, yet I listened to this bizzare socialogical experiment and even derived some enjoyment from Merv sledging Blowers.

Now I’m loathing Merv the selector. He keeps picking bloody Victorians, and this time there’s not only a better New South Welsh player who actually has a CA central contract, there’s even a better Queenslander, one who didn’t make the tour, and he also has a central contract, and can bat.

If only there was some way to evaluate the bowling options in Indian conditions on recent form. The easy way would be to look at the Australia A tour to India a few weeks ago, you remember the one run for the purpose of developing and evaluating talent for the upcomming test series.

There was only one innings in which Australia bowled, returning the figures:

Doug Bollinger: 21 overs, 4/59
Peter Siddle: 15 overs, 1/27
Ashley Noffke: 19.4 overs, 1/67

Now to keep it in perspective, I should mention that Siddle’s sole wicket was the number 10. Douggie got the Indian 1, 6, 8 and 9.

Despite looking 35, he is only 27. The old-young man has even secured advanced hair sponsorship so no longer looks like a ballbag, and has something in common with Rick(y). Doug Bollinger should be collecting his baggy green cap today, and Peter Siddle should be collocting a refreshing beverage for Doug, I’d say an Indian Pale Ale but perhaps in this case a glass of Bollinger would be more appropriate.

Gee that’s a lot of blue. Some would say not enough blue, and they’d be right.

The big in’s for the Moomoo cup champions – the mighty New South Wales Bluetongues – are Doug ‘Ballbag’ Bollinger and Beau ‘Repair’ Casson and Simon ‘looks like Moses’ Katich.

Brad Haddin is the sole keeper in the squad of 25, seems like good thinking there unless we do anything rash.. like go on tour.

Shaun Marsh takes over Chris Rogers’ WA quota spot, while the Foreyed Gingah has been struck by the Mexican Meningitis – any link with Victoria and a cricketer should instantly be excluded from all contact with the national side. Serves him right really for leaving the Westies, he should have stuck around with the other NSW rejects if he really wanted to press for higher bank balances.

David Hussey is likely to be the first player tainted with the Mexican Meningitis brush to develop potent anti-bodies since the great Shane Keith Warne retired, as such he has gained a six figure package to go with his lucrative IPL cash cow.

Brad Hodge continues to be an exception to all rules of common sense and decency. Unless he goes and finds a hot blonde wife he has NO PLACE in the baggy green.

Both Cullen’s have been left Mullin over their new lifestyle choices after what can only be described as sh1thouse seasons. Some might say they were dropped for sharing a border with Victoria that isn’t protected by a river. They could well be right.

Bracken’s hair is no doubt still appalling, Forrest and Haddin hit centuries in our only innings (declared) and now all is well in the world. Just waiting for cricket.com.au to update the table so we can see NSW at the top on 20 points. Stay tuned for next Friday when Macgilla warms the MCG bench for the top of table clash against the Mexican’s with Mobiles.