Tag Archives: cameron white

Stars denied leave as Big Bash heats up

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Man Cry

Man Cry

This evening will see Victoria and Queensland fight it out at the Gabba in a high stakes elimination final T20 match. The winner will not only gain entry to the lucrative world club championship, but also the privilege of a Twenty20 lesson from the top dog in Australian domestic Twenty20 cricket at the SCG on Sunday.

The Victorians are píssed off, as having their top players unavailable due to national service is a new problem for them. Now they’ll have to go without the services of Cameron White and David Hussey, who have a ODI on Friday and need their beauty sleep. There is no factual basis to reports that Cameron White Cried, again, at hearing the news, though it does sound likely.

Ryan Harris has been dropped from the national squad so will be available for Queensland, however they’ve replaced him with Mitchell Johnson so that’s probably worse for the New Texas Bulls, who’ll also be missing James Hopes.

CA have also denied requests for the players to be available of for the final, so NSW will be missing David Warner, Michael Clarke, Nathan Bracken, Brad Haddin and Nathan Hauritz.

This could well end up a good experience, as Michael Hussey is keen to explain IPL loyalties come before the state that bought you up, so depending on which IPL teams make the club championship any Australian side could be without their stars when the big bucks are on offer.

Victoria squad: Brad Hodge (capt), Aiden Blizzard, Rob Quiney, Aaron Finch, Andrew McDonald, Matthew Wade, Adam Crosthwaite (wk), Damien Wright, Shane Harwood, Jon Holland, Bryce McGain, Dirk Nannes.

Queensland squad: Chris Simpson (capt), Wade Townsend, Ryan Broad, Lee Carseldine, Nathan Reardon, Glen Batticciotto, Craig Philipson, Chris Hartley (wk), Ryan Harris, Nathan Rimmington, Ben Cutting, Alister McDermott, Ben Laughlin.

Bracken put a new spin on Test Selection

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at least the hair is real

The hair is real

I was reading an excellent new blog (well I just found it anyway) called The Old Batsman which I’d recommend you all check out.

While there I came across an interesting story about Nathan Bracken learning to bowl spin to get himself back into the Baggy Green Test squad.

For mine the idea has a lot of merit. The selectors get wood when someone can bowl slow. Spinning the ball does not appear to be a necessity, nor is a decent record at shield level. As long as you claim to be a spinner you can get the baggy green for a test or two before getting dumped quicker than a knocked up Britney.

In recent memory we gave Beau Casson a test in the West Indies before dropping him and tearing up his central contract, Bryce McGain was a virtual selection before his shoulder imploded, Cameron White got 3 Tests as our very own answer to Ashley Giles (not that anyone ever asked that question), Jason Krezkya played a test and took 12 wickets to be dropped then picked up a training injury, and Nathan Hauritz also had a shot in Adelaide.

Bracken is tending towards the Funky Miller style of right-arm off breaks in the 90-95 kph range, and this makes a hell of a lot of sense. As the worlds’ top ranked one-day bowler he has the experience, temperament and man-hair that will help him become a success in the spinning role.

Also it’s refreshing to see a player who on paper really could be in the Baggy Green squad go and do something about it rather than just bítch to the media about non-selection. Brad Hodge if you’re reading this, give yourself an uppercut.

The final reason this is a good idea is that Ricky and the selectors are abnormally excited by any player who has a dual purpose. We’ve got Andrew Symonds as a specialist no 6 batsman who doesn’t score any runs/gun fielder, Shane Watson as a bowler/opening/no 7/catwalk diversion, Michael Hussey who bats 5/bowls impotent medium pace/couriers hats to fine leg, Simon Katich to open the batting/not bowl cause Ricky doesn’t give him the ball and Matthew Hayden to apply pressure to the top order/preach the gospel/píss off the 3rd world.

Curiously, Bracken claims his biggest obstacle in becoming a spinner is talking his captains into throwing him the ball on a short run-up. Here’s a brainwave, bowl well in the nets and prove yourself to them. Or even better, bowl the first ball normally then just fúck ‘em and bowl your spinners. If you’re half decent they’ll be on board in no time.

Cricket WAGS Deathmatch – Round 1

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Welcome to Round 1 of the Aussie Cricket WAGS DeathMatch. The rules are simple, just vote for the hottest missus in each pool. If you’re torn between two of the lovely entrants, I suggest you give bonus consideration to the one with the uglier cricketer who would never have scored such a hottie were it not for his sporting career.

All up there’s 8 votes this round, and the images are in the same order as the poll choices. You can hover your mouse over the pictures to see the names, and can also click the thumbnails for the full size and un-cropped picture to open in a new window.

{democracy:2}

Annika McNamara Christine Padfield Sue Langer
{democracy:3}

Georgie Willis Jacqui Morris Simone Warne
{democracy:4}

Haley Bracken Anna Gillespie Kellie Hayden
{democracy:5}

Elizabeth Lee Jessica Bratich Meredith Jenkins
{democracy:6}

Mel Gilchrist Lara Bingle Amy Hussey
{democracy:7}

Danielle Small Lee Furlong Michelle Clark
{democracy:8}

Katie Johnson Karina castle Meg Hodge
{democracy:9}

Amber van Schiajik Lindsay Kasprowicz Rianna Ponting

Ponting throws series to play New Zealand

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Mini-Rick the Prick

Mini-Rick the Prick

What a fúcking disgrace the third session was yesterday. I can’t believe Rick would be so fúcking stupid to compromise the full trophy cupboard he inherited from Steve for the sake of some shítty over rate.

Oh how I hate this inbred Tasmanian wánker. Let me count the ways.

  • Would you sacrifice playing New Zealand in Brisbane for a better chance of winning in India? Hell Yeah!
  • We managed to get 10 overs behind on the over rate, despite bowling Jason Krejza for 20ish overs
  • Is it absolutely neccesarry to change the field three times an over?
  • Why doens’t the moved fielder run to their new position during the tri-overly field changes?
  • If the over rate is so damn important, why don’t we tell Lee and Johnson to shorten their run-ups like they do in ODI’s, as surely Lee off a half run-up when the ball’s reversing is still more threatening than Hussey?
  • Why the bloody hell did we drop Stuart Clark for Cameron fúcking White, who despite my best wishes has proven to be a very ordinary number 8 batsman and less effective than Michael Clarke.
  • Why not bowl Simon Katich? Ponting’s ignored him all series.
  • Tim Nielsen is a díckless wannabe. They interviewed him last night and one of the reasons that the quicks didn’t bowl after tea was they were tired! Give me a fúcking break, there are three of them, they’d just had a 20 minute rest, and they could have bowled in tandem with Krejza.
  • If we must play Cameron White, make him captain.. all he has to do is go out and lose the toss (as Rick for some help there), then Rick can still move his fields thrice an over, and Whitey gets the arse.

Time for Regieme Change. Nielsen to be given the arse for being díckless, Ponting demoted and on notice that the team is bigger than the man, and number 3 batsmen need to score runs.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d like for nothing more than us to pull this victory off, but it should have been so much simplier, and all the Indians have to do now is bowl a metre outside offstump to an 8-1 field like they did in the first innings. Then Rick will bítch about their defensive tactics while the Indians parade their Border-Gavaskar trophy in front of the 250 fans who bothered to show up in Nagpur.

I want Ponting dropped from captain and Nielsen and Chappel thrown out of the coaching staff. Time to give the reins to Tom Moody or Allan Border… and… Simon Katich

Slaying Demons on the Delhi Road

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Katich Beard's a Hatrick

Katich Beard's a Hatrick

I’m off to Cairns for the next 10 days so it’s unlikely that I’ll blog in that time. So to fill the gap I’ll bring out the crystal ball to predict the remainder of this test.

Day 3 in Delhi will be a day of demon slaying. Simon Katich doesn’t shave this morning and now has a beard, which is instrumental in his bearding up a quick century, before a mid-pitch collision with Gambhir that leads to his run out. Both players are summoned before Chris Broad for spirit of the game violations.

Ricky Ponting comes in last over before lunch and hits 28 off Kumble to get his eye in. The next two sessions are absolute mayhem with Ricky and Haydo’s going at 9.33 runs an over. By stumps Ricky is on 281* and Hayden 401* of which 202 came off Zaheer Khan, or Haydo’s bítch as he’s now known. Australia are sitting pretty overnight at 1/788. Brian Lara is spewing to have lost both big records in the same series.

Ricky and Haydos retire overnight and Australia open Day 4 with T20 specialists Cameron White and Shane Watson batting. They bat for exactly 20 overs and put on a further 220 runs (White 118* and Watson 102*) before Ricky declares 395 runs ahead at 3/1008.

Katich opens the bowling with Brett Lee. In his first over he has Sehwag caught and bowled off the back of his bat when his reverse sweep gets all tangled up. Next over Gambhir charges down the pitch at Katich, but Simon says no and fires the ball hard down leg. Haddin completes the stumping.

Dravid is caught the very next ball by Ponting who still refuses to wear a helmet at silly mid and Katto’s on a hatrick. VVS walks to the crease to the sound of 350 Indian fans screaming (another great day for crowd attendance). Katto bowls him the wrongun and VVS again fails to pick it, shouldering arms to the ball that beards him outside the line of off but has done enough to convince Billy to raise his crooked finger. 4/28.

Tendulkar is next to go, retired hurt by a corker of a delivery from Stuart Clark, that picthed on a good length and reared up viciously, smashing him on the neck. A helicopter is flown in and Tendulkar is medically evacuated. I hope he’s ok.

Play resumes and Ganguly takes 6 minutes to appear at the crease, and even then with two left gloves. Ponting appeals and the Prince of Calcutta is timed out.

Full credit for Dhoni’s wicket goes to Steve Waugh, though I doubt you’ll hear that story from Cameron White. Dhoni blocked a regulation straight delivery then it bounced back towards the stumps only for Dhoni to knock it clear with his gloved hand. Handled ball. White cried. Again. 7/84, 311 behind.

Brett Lee and Stuart Clark cleaned up the tail, with only Mishra providing some resistance with a hard fought 120. Australia win by an innings and 240 runs. Katto beards man of the match. True Story.