Friday Head Fúck #2

There is only one way to eat hot chips and avoid accusations of homosexuality.

They should be grabbed in bunches of whatever you happen to pick up. They’re then to be mangled into alignment and shoved into your mouth. Lathering them with sauce is permissible, however the only way to avoid big red all over the fingers is to then grab one sharp stubby chip and use it to stab the others.

Here’s what to avoid at all costs:

• Eating a single chip at a time, gay.
• Taking more than one bite to eat a chip, gay.
• Using cutlery to eat chips, gay.
• Questioning the value of chicken salt, gay
• Referring to chips as freedom fries, gay