A hard earned thirst needs a mid-strength beer

Fosters Australia have recently decided to drop the alcohol percentage of VB from 4.9% to 4.8%, and are expecting to save $20m a year in excise tax. Additionally they are increasing the cost of their beers by 2%, no doubt forecasting massive rewards for their shareholders.

One thing the marketing bigwigs at Fosters may not have counted on however is the ill-will this will cause in VB drinkers who will no doubt see this as a blatant money grab.

Just last week I was getting some work done on my outboard motor by a mechanic in exchange for a case of beer. I asked him what he wanted, to which he replied “VB”, only for one of his workmates to say “Hey you don’t want that shit VB, the c*nts are dropping the alcohol in it”. He settled for Carlton Draught, and with just that one small business switching over VB have lost around 6 cases of beer a week.

I find it that a company who’ve spent so much on market research in the past can honestly believe that people drink VB for the taste! Seriously, this is the funniest thing I’ve heard since the Bulls smashed the Eddie Jones’ Reds 92-3 in Pretoria.

“It certainly doesn’t affect the taste, which is very important to our VB drinkers,” VB spokesman Ben Wicks said. “The taste will stay exactly the same. Our master brewers have done a lot of work to make sure of that.” Source

NEWSFLASH: VB is drunk by tradesmen and labourers for the express purpose of getting shitfaced.

By my calculations the new formula VB is 2% weaker than the iconic 4.9% edition, which in terms of alcohol intake equates to one beer in every two cases. When you also take into account the 2% price hike, it’s fair to say that Fosters are now selling a 23 beer box.

How long before they reverse this decision?

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3 Responses to A hard earned thirst needs a mid-strength beer

  1. Nursedude says:

    I’ll tell you what, Andrew, when I visited Oz last year, I was STUNNED at how much you Aussies pay for beer. It’s great beer, a lot better than 99% of the stuff in the states(at least better then Bud or Miller), but still you guys really get taxed to death if you want to enjoy a brew.

  2. Nursedude says:

    PS-your mate who chose the Carlton, I was pretty impressed with that beer, as well.

  3. justinspratt says:

    far king spot on moses… this is one funny post too!